"The capacity to be alone in the presence of someone else" is a paradox that represent, in Winnicott vew, the most precious possession and it is granted for both mother and child at the same time. In this paper the paradox is applied to clinical situations to show the consequences when people have not gain this capacity, especially on couple and family therapy. Two novels are used for show how links can produce an intrapsychic change, positive or catastrophic. The novel The rest of the warrior, utilized by Bleger in his theory, is a good example of a couple in a destructive symbiotic link; in the other hand the movie Force majeure, were a traumatic event produce a couple crisis, show the possibility to have important insight about "the capaci-ty to be alone in the presence of someone else".
Keywords: The capacity to be alone, denegative pacts, dependency, separation, subjectivation.